beach bumming

ang cool

as usual naka harap ako sa aking mac (uuuuy di naman sakin!) na nagpapanggap mag trabaho habang pinipigilang hindi makatulog sa kabusugan (omgush ang sarap ng breaky namin - tom yam goong saka moo tod*) nang narinig ko! narinig ko ang paulit ulit na salitang ni ra-rap. bebot bebot daw.

hmm i looked up from my desk and saw some guy rapping in Tagalog. then i saw the infamous fergie and her belly. ahhh… black eyed peas. i’ve never seen this music video before though i’ve heard of it. oo na late na kung late. sabi nga ni manel nung pinatugtog daw ito sa embassy natigil daw yung party in disgust (malamang na jologan kasi Tagalog rap nga naman. hihihi) until somebody screamed it’s BEP.

hehe i’ve never really been a fan of that kind of hip hop. i mean it looks cool and all but i’m more of the r&b and yes smintot i admit it pop. hehe. anyways bebot was on samui channel. my officemates also stopped what they were doing and peered from their desks smiling and pointing “filipino, na?”. i said yup my eyes still fixed on the TV.

well as expected the vid was well made and all that. the philippine flag was plastered like everywhere and MAN there was even a jeep. pretty cool stuff. i particularly like the ending when apl.de.ap (yaar i googled his name and read his tear jerking story) pulled the filipina away from the mayhem and they left. so typical of a pinoy to be protective of their women.

anyways, i’ve always been a pretty mush person. naiyak na naman tuloy ako. takbo ako sa banyo. huhu. it just seems cool that Allan Pineda was able to reach success and get the message across about Pinoys all over the world. and he didn’t forget. i was reading Jimenez commencement address to Siliman U (posted by Kuya Jet) and it really stuck to me that i should return to my homeland and GIVE. apl.de.ap has certainly done that. kudos kababayan. sana nga lahat tayong mga Filipino makapag give back in our own way. i don’t expect to reach stardom but i think being good advocates of our country can be enough. i always keep in mind that whatever i do here in siam is a direct reflection of my country… my family. let this be enough to guide us… sana
having lived away from the Philippines for over a year and having witnessed and at times been part of the racial discrimination some stupid ass caucasian would do, i have to give it up to those who unwaveringly continue to sacrifice their happiness for the sake of their families.

it’s not right that countrymen has had to face some abuse, especially those who had to work at depressing conditions be it today or decades ago. though there are some instances that some Pinoys can be embarrassing… but one thing is for sure - we could be wentworth miller handing out his cranes of familial bonds any time…

* yung tom yam goong parang sinigang na hipon tapos yung moo tod piniritong baboy. ang sarap syet.

yawn* i know i should be working on thy website but my mind keeps floating back to a vision of a big mac (im so going straight to mcdonalds after work)

so i go back to stare at the codes at dreamweaver, open safari up and google wentworth miller, jude law and then my forever crush - chris o’donnel. hehe. i know im stupid.

i’ve got all these plans for some new shows scribbled in my new pink notebook. dum di dum. im waiting for my boss to get back on the island. she’s in norway at the moment - chilling - no pun intended.

so i doodle my future son and daughter’s names on my brand new pink notebook and realize how psycho i’ve become. i mean i almost sent an email to bibi about my top picks for our kids’ names. haha. oh my god, i need a break from boredom.

p.s. happy birthday little girl

alam niyo ba, ewan ko ba naman sakin. i can honestly say i’ve been a living testimony para Sa Kanya since 1997 nung namulat ako sa katotohanan (consequently - yun yung nag YLSS ako - thanks Jing!) yun nga lang - nag 2006 - nagulo mundo ko.

anyways, when i found out that i had to register at poea before leaving the country, i was just about ready to give up. nakakapagod kaya magasikaso ng mga ganyan - then comes the government officials. argh batu-bato sa langit - i know some peeps i went to college with are instructors in devcom blah blah - guys di kayo yun
alam ko naman na i don’t have to work here in thailand. wouldn’t it be better if i just stay home and be with my family. i even told my dad magkakatulong na lang ako sa bahay. hehe. si cherie nga ngiting ngiti nung nalaman na ayoco na bumalik.

anyways after much thought and many convos with papa (surprisingly siya and nag encourage this time to go back), tita mabec and emails from my boss and haydee… i decided to just get on the plane without registering. hello di biro yung 10T na registration fee. DUH! ayus ayos nga Pilipinas!

ofcourse i told everyone to pray for me.

on the way to the airport and during my weeping breaks (hehe - ang baduy ko… iyak ako ng iyak) i prayed hard to Him to help me. help me get on that plane and help me not to miss everybody so much. ayoco tlga mag sinungaling (my script was “i am a freelance writer doing some research…”) just in case magtanong yung immigration officer.

He heard me. Immigration was a breeze and I even got to be treated like a first class passenger coz I saw the Arenas family (whose house I occasionally crash at when I’m in Bangkok) who had friends in high places.

Also on the way to the ATM I kept praying na sana binayaran na ako for my half month of December. My boss and I had a deal na leave without pay ako since super haba tlga ng bakasyon ko. Guys, guess what - they paid me in full. Goodness! I was so surprised and at the same time embarrassed! This was the company that I almost dissed just because tinatamad ako magpunta sa POEA. Grabe na feel ko talaga na love nila ako. Sana walang bawian. Haha!

These are answered prayers at its best. So guys don’t lose hope. He really is there! I admit minsan especially last year I found myself thinking na baka hindi totoo PERO here it is again - a living testimony of His love, mercy and care. Saya noh? Praise GOD! Nakikinig Siya.

kumain ako ng somtam at kung anu-ano pang mga maaanghang na putake na lokal sa dito sa siam. ang sarap pero medyo naghihinagpis ata ang akin tiyan. di na sanay. hehe.

pero ang saya, dun kami sa may picnic table kumain, kaharap namin ang dalampasigan na medyo naghihimutok. yep malamig ang panahon dito sa isla kong malayo sayo. i like it.

medyo na miss ko rin pala. medyo iba kasi ang kumpanyang ito - parang pamilya. so salu-salo kami dun kanina. masaya. masarap.

gusto ko yun. mahangin - walang araw - malapit sa dagat - at higit sa lahat… maraming pagkain!

salamat Lord sa araw po na ito. promise bukas diet na ulet ako.

im finally back in siam and am i bored.

my flight back to the fabled island of no return (hehe) has been delayed three times already. i am trying my best to keep my composure - im so damn bored. shetters tlga! arggghhhh!

so this is what screaming inside feels like. and honestly if i hear the repetitive whimsical tunes from the talking santa claus behind me i’ll have to bang my head on the wall. hehe. im sounding like a lunatic. honeslty nagdadabog na ata ako dito. hay naku.

i hope my landlord cleaned my place ike he promised and painted my furniture chocolate brown. im not going to expect anything because if it doesnt happen i think im really gonna lose it.

hehe. look at me. just a few hours back to the reality of my so called daily grind and im going bonkers. and to think i just came from a month long vacation. sheesh. im blaming it on hormones. yep it’s that time of the month again.

so i was watching sex and the city last night. yep i started the marathon FINALLY since che had gone back to her dorm, i can hog the TV to myself.

i found myself laughing out loud at some of the things carrie was demanding from BIG. i saw myself in her while she tried to analyze every freaking thing her so called BF did to her. hehe. it was like i was seeing the show through new eyes. it was like i was seeing a crazy person on TV and that crazy person was exactly like me.

it’s funny how all the while i was thinking nothing was coming out of my banishment to thailand. hahaha see how cynical i’ve become? i mean i know it’s a great opportunity to work there and actually live just a few hop and skips from the beach… yada yada… but matel did tell me a couple of days into my holiday that i had become meaner. take note, meaner. couldn’t agree more. haha. count on your sis to judge you straight up. 2006 and siam toughened me up to a lean and quite frankly - a mean machine.

i’m not yet sure if all these “experiences” is for the better of my spirit or not. all i know is that i appreciate my family, my friends and my bb even more.

that’s all for now. i have a busy day today. tomorrow im going back to the island
thanks guys for making my bakasyon uber special, you know who you are - love you.